Glycerine
by xxbitterflyxx
Summary: i was really depressed when i wrote this. bakura x ryou


a/n: this is my first song-fic ever. please be gentle. i dont want any flames. im really not having a good day.

disclaimer: my mom said they were mine, and shes never wrong. dont anger her. so, she must be right...

* * *

Glycerine

_Must be your skin that I'm sinking in _

_Must be for real 'cos now I can feel_

I've never realized it before, but you are so soft. It's like touching a sheet of feathers. Your skin like smooth marble and your hair like silk. Are you always this beautiful? I've never noticed it back then. I must not have cared. Do you realize the change?

_And I didn't mind _

_It's not my kind__  
Not my time to wonder why_

It doesn't matter does it? This sudden change. You like it. So, it's true isn't it? You've loved me from the beginning. I was so blind. Would you ever forgive me? Mmm, you're so beautiful. Can I touch you? Are you crying?

_Everything's gone white  
And everything's grey  
Now you're here now you're away_

Your tears remind me of the other day. Don't cry. I'll never hurt you again. It all has changed, I promise. You don't believe me? I don't doubt it. I don't believe myself. Is this what they call love? Don't look at me like that.

_I don't want this  
Remember that  
I'll never forget where you're at_

Why are you leaving me? Didn't I apologize? Didn't I fall at your feet and beg for forgiveness? It's too much isn't it? No, I can understand. If you must go, then leave. I'm a liar anyways. Why are you hugging me? God, you're so confusing.

_Don't let the days go by  
Glycerine_

Just a little longer. You're so warm and I'm so cold. You knew didn't you? That's why you hugged me. Are you reading my mind? You know I hate it when you do that, though I do it to you behind your back. Is that why you read mine? To find the answers? You always were so clever.

_I'm never alone  
I'm alone all the time  
Are you at one  
Or do you lie_

So it's final. You're leaving. So be it. I never needed you. There I go lying again. You only smile. Why do you smile? I watch you step into the cold. The cold snow stinging your face. Are you sure you don't want to stay a little longer? We could make some cocoa. You always liked that. At least I think you do. Do I even know you like I think I do? Like I wish I did.

_We live in a wheel  
Where everyone steals  
But when we rise it's like strawberry fields_

And for a moment, I could have sworn I saw you frown. But no. You continue smiling. I love you. I hate you. I hate to love you. I remember the mornings we awoke together. Did I ever tell you that when the sun shines down on your bruises they look so pretty? Pretty on you. Only on you. That's why I hurt you, just to see those bruises. I'm so sorry.

_If I treated you bad  
You bruise my face  
Couldn't love you more  
You got a beautiful taste_

The door shuts in my face. After seeing you smile like that, I could have sworn I cried out. I don't remember now. Five minutes have already passed and I still wait at the door. Staring at it like a child would stare at his closet at night. I wait. Wait. What is taking you so long to get back? I know you'll come back. You wouldn't leave me here, would you?

_Don't let the days go by  
Could have been easier on you  
I couldn't change though I wanted to_

I find myself sitting in the chair you always sat in. Your chair. The chair you would cuddle in after I beat you. After I would beat you so hard you would bleed. Sometimes I wish I never did that. Then sometimes I wish I never made you clean it up, because I want to see your blood so bad right now. It's sick isn't it? Please, come back.

_Could have been easier by three  
Our old friend fear and you and me  
Glycerine_

I step up. If you were walking you couldn't have gone far by now. If I run, I could make it. Couldn't I? Why am I questioning myself? You've only been gone ten minutes and I'm already going crazy. I find myself running out the door, pushing the old oak aside, and it slamming into a few pictures of you and I. That's ok.If I find you, I promise to take more pictures. These pictures will be better. I promise.

_Don't let the days go by  
glycerine_

Is that you? There, by the bridge. What are you doing? The snow is blinding me. I used to like snow, but if it's in my way to get to you, I fucking hate it. You jump. Why? Why do you jump? I pause. Did I just see what I think I did? I walk closer. I see a body hanging from the bridge. What crazy person would do this? Was this person pushed to insanity that he couldn't take it anymore? That he finally decided to end it. To end the pain. To kill himself. Now that I think, I think that was you.

_I needed you more  
When we wanted us less  
I could not kiss just regress_

I pull at the rope, bringing you up. Your neck has snapped. That's ok. I'll do the same. I run my fingers through your matted hair. Did I already tell you that you were beautiful? Once more wouldn't hurt, would it? I search for the pocketknife in my jeans. It all ends here.

_It might just be  
Clear simple and plain  
That's just fine  
That's just one of my names _

I bring the knife to my wrist. Sliding it over my skin. My body is so cold laying here in the snow. Are you cold too? I bring your body close to mine. It's alright; I'll keep you warm. Red falls on white. It looks lovely. I wish you could see it. Watch it like we've watched the stars, like we've watched the sun rise and fall. I'm finally with you again, and this time I wont let you leave. We'll be together forever. Like Romeo and his beloved Juliet. We will be together in death.

_Don't let the days go by  
Could've been easier on you  
Glycerine_

_

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_

a/n: well, how was it? now that I think about it, go ahead and flame. ...damnit.


End file.
